Thursday, October 16, 2008

Insomnia and other treasures

It is currently 5:30 am. I have been up since 3 am. I am the only one in my house that is awake. Every one is asleep. Even my sweet little baby has been sleeping all night.

Now, I am trying very hard to stay positive about this. I mean, it's quiet in the house. I was able to eat a bowl of cereal. Go to the bathroom. Check my email.
All with out interruption.

But seriously though body...WHAT THE FUCK!?

I am no stranger to sleepless nights. I have got one of those little Hamster in the Plastic Ball kind of brains that just spins and spins. In the past, these nights have caused me much frustration and tears. I would usually toss and turn for hours and usually I would end up waking the Hubs so he could console me and pet my hair.

Tonight I tried something a little different. While tomorrow (today) is bound to suck just as hard at least I am not crying or super frustrated at this point. I didn't feel right about waking the Hubs and after trying several of my usual tricks (including several sleep locations) I decided to give up. And, if I keep to my positive theme...I cam muster a bit of enjoyment out of the peaceful darkness that surrounds me as I sit cocooned, wrapped in a quilt on my living room sofa. Oooo...Maybe I should make tea.

Having said all that... you must know that I am wide awake. I am freakin' tired and what kind of a freak can't sleep when their whole family is sleeping!


Anyhoo,

A year ago today, I went to the doctor after peeing on three pregnancy tests and seeing for the first time the two pink lines I had always dreamed of seeing!

Not a day goes by, sleepless night or not, that I do not truly believe that I am the luckiest woman alive.

Ruby is 4 months old today!

Have I mentioned how much I love her lately?

Some of her most popular tricks these days include:

-her two canines
-rolling on to her side
-batting at objects
-yelling at toys
-smiling and laughing
-sitting- for a couple of seconds
-lap standing and being pulled up to a standing position
-being really cute
-crying
-pooping
-sleeping- naps are still hit and miss
-grabbing and holding
-biting
-sticking everything in her mouth -very cute
-drooling
-flirting
-kicking
-looking at books
-holding her head up and steady
-burping and farting


Ummm... There's probably more but that's all I can think of right now. Still though, I find it mind boggling. How could this petite little being have grown inside me, emerged, be fed just by me and grow to be a completely separate and unique human being. It really does blow my mind. On a daily basis.

Another mind blowing fact is that the Hubs and I when on our first date sans
baby last Saturday. Ruby stayed at home with her Grandparents. They were in town for Ruby's first Thanksgiving. Which by the way went off quite well. We were exhausted (We really haven't been sleeping well- and it doesn't have anything to do with Ruby!) but both sets of grand parents were here along with the hub's sister and my brother. The food was delicious, thanks hubby o 'mine and both families got along great. Ruby was the center piece as we all huddled around her play mat with our meal on our laps in our tiny living room.

I digress. See what insomnia can do! It's affecting my blogging even!

So, It was nice to go out to have a meal and chat uninterrupted but we found the whole experience a tad overrated. Perhaps we're just lame. Had their been energy for mind blowing lovin' our opinion might have been different. We did not talk about the baby the entire time but when we returned after a couple of hours the Grandparents were disappointed. "We're just getting to the good stuff! they explained as they tried to shoo us back out the door. Needless to say there had been several outfit changes and at least one photo shoot.

I am sure their will be many more sleepless nights, dates and grandparent inspired photo shoots in our future.

And you know what?

I couldn't be happier.




11 comments:

California Girl said...

You sound so lovely and content. Even if you aren't sleeping!

Try and get some rest my dear... Have you tried deep belly breathing? That can kind of shift the focus of your mind, which helps me get into a good groove of sleep.

Dr. Grumbles said...

hope you get some sleep!

Ruby is looking great!

Surprised Suburban Wife said...

There is no insomnia worse than New Mumma Insomnia...the one time you KNOW you're supposed to sleep but can't. Yuck. TOTALLY know what that's like. Ruby looks great though & so accomplished! 4 months was when I really started noticing Megan's personality, and although I loved her from the get-go, I really REALLY started loving her personality from 4 months onwards. Keep savouring every minute!

Jackie said...

Happy four months Ruby. Sorry you can't sleep, that sucks. I love the first picture of Ruby...my guy never sleeps on his back so we never get to see that pose.

Jen said...

She is such a doll :-) The accomplishments nly get more exciting from here on in - so pay close attention!

I know what you mean about the date nights. Our first date night we were back an hour and half later not because we were worried about Nate or because we missed him so terribly but that's just how long it tok to eat dinner! LOL

Chili said...

Sorry you can't sleep! So unfair that you can be that exhausted and still unable to sleep!

Happy Four Month Birthday Ruby!

kgirl said...

there is nothing that makes me giggle more than baby farts. seriously. ruby is so freakin adorable, but no wonder, cuz she looks just like you and your mama. love.
no go get some sleep, loser.

Reesh said...

It's been awhile since I've seen you and the Rubinator I just realised! I have yet to see her teeth, or see her lap standing and many other accomplishments! If you're not into real dates then perhaps a family date with us sometime soon...

I too have a very active brain that is impossible to shut off sometimes. I wish I had some tricks for you. The best I can offer you in help with Ruby during the day after a sleepless night so you can take a nap if you can sleep!

Loren said...

Good to know that sans baby date wasn't all that it was cracked up to be- Hubs and I are going to celebrate our anniversary in 3 weeks with baby in tow, and we were a little disappointed she will be too little for me to even think about letting her be without me for an hour!
I'm so glad you are doing so great, besides your weird sleep issues. And I am jealous over Ruby sleeping all night!

Heather said...

Have you tried chamomile tea? It always calms down my brain for sleepy time. I only like plain chamomile, not any of those sleepy time tea blends.

So glad you got a date night. Very important. And it's great when grandparents get to spend quality time with their grandkids. My in-laws loves to spend time with our daughter. It's great!

GreaseMonkey said...

I am kind of feeling the same thing. My son is 6 weeks old now and is starting to stretch his bottles from 2 1/2 hours to 4 hours now. I usually spend the 45 minutes after feeding him listening to him grunt and toss and turn to make sure he goes to sleep without crying again. Now that he's sleeping longer, I lay awake panicing that he might not be breathing since I haven't heard him is so long.