I know I am not a bad person, nor am I a terrible mom.
And, last night's episode of 4 continuous hours of crying and screaming came as no shock to me.
However, after walking, feeding, changing, bouncing, swaddling, soothing, and rocking -exhaustion set in.
There were some adult sized tears.
Some deal making.
Some under the breath mutterings.
In fact, I think my exact words to my darling one month old baby girl were, " Oh my God Ruby, What the fuck?"
Nice one, mom.
Finally, I set her in the blessed BOB (for a second time) and we wearily trudged off to the park to fetch my husband from his sporting activities/male bonding evening.
He came home with me.
He calmed our daughter.
He calmed me.
I love him.
Once my baby girl was sleeping soundly and my frustration had subsided...
It was quiet again.
It was quiet enough for me to hear my Ruby breathe and dream.
It was quiet enough to feel the love.
8 comments:
I think I may have muttered that exact phrase to my darling Nadia just last night! Hang in there my sweet, newborns are hard work but it gets easier...
I'm pretty sure Nate has heard those words at least a few times in 10 months, too! So much easier to feel the love when it's calm and quiet! Thank goodness for good husbands/daddies!
Yes I have totally muttered those words to my son. I am glad things returned to calm
The f bomb definitely gets dropped in these parts too. Totally normal! But 4 hours of crying = yuck and hopefully that won't happen much more.
Thank you for this honest post. When I am muttering WTF under my breath I won't feel like a horrible Mom now. ;)
Hooray for dads!
Hooray for the quiet moments mixed in with the chaos and uncertainty!
Mine is more blasphemous...it's usually J.C child what IS the problem?!? or OMG Isaac knock it off...isn't motherhood great. Worse case scenario babies first word is a cuss (which will be funny in retrospect), reality, we're doing a great job and are only human.
Like everyone else, I know for a FACT that the Prawn probably heard those words a good deal during her first year and would probably still hear them now, but I'm totally afraid she'll repeat them back to me, so I have to find other methods of expressing my frustration.
You're a brilliant mom! :)
Post a Comment